My guy and I lead the Couples Ministry at our church, and our focus so far has been on three distinct groups of people: engaged couples marrying in the next six months, married couples who want to deepen their relationships and couples who are struggling to live under the same roof. We are in the process of rolling out a plan to assist all three types of couples, each with very different needs.
Along with another couple, we started a seven week pre-marital small group, meeting with six couples who are mere months away from walking down the aisle. One third of them will become married over the course of the group meetings. It is so exciting to have the opportunity to sit down and talk with these young people who have stars in their eyes and big plans for the future. It’s also pretty challenging because….stars and plans and all.
Our initial idea was to use pre-packaged curriculum that walks them through what scripture (King James version!) says about marriage, shames them for having pre-marital sex and teaches the importance of covenant relationships. Then we started thinking of these couples as people, and how would we want our children to be led when they grow up and make these big plans? Some of these couples are not believers, coming to church with their intended for the first time in their lives. We landed on putting together some talks that utilize scripture and our experience, sprinkled with You Tube videos and open ended questions.Honestly, if we bring them a step closer to Christ, I think we can call it a success.
We are hitting on topics like, Why Get Married?, Love & Understanding, Communication, Conflict & Forgiveness, Money and Intimacy. I’m wondering what you wish you had been told right before you met your fiancée at the end of the aisle and said, I do. I don’t know if I would have listened at all, but I keep coming back to the same message that could have really helped me: marriage is hard, and it’s worth it.
So, you are sitting in our living room with these bright-eyed young couples and you’ve got the floor – what would you say? And if you have some great You Tube videos to share, I would love to hear about those, too!